The Quote -

"Nope, I don't really have anything new to say. but then, I always have something amazing to tell about things that you already know!!"

-Muthu

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Another girl; Another day; - A short fiction

The Snap-






The Fiction-



" What are you going to do me... " Her voice trembled.

" What else... " He smirked. "than to raping you.. "

She tried to get up and slipped, falling on her face. Her jaw broke in with a sick thud. Blood poured. Her legs refused to respond, torn at the shins, they begged her to forgive them. They could not save her anymore. She cried. A broken brook of agony, the cold pain of what's to come.

In between the tears that flowed mixing with the gutter and blood,he noticed she was mumbling something to him.

He smiled and bent down, trying to listen to her last words. The last begging for mercy always gave him the best hard on.

He whispered to her. "go on dear... I am listening... " .

Her voice was faint but stern. "Please can you kill me after you are done with me........."



A few silent seconds paused. Somehow he was not able to hear her crying anymore.

Nor was he feeling anything when he walked away from there. Just emptiness. Dark, bleak and grey.





Author's note-


Well, I was actually planning to write a 55 fiction but fiction grew without restraint into more than 55 words. Hope you guys enjoyed the piece. And Wish you guys a happy Pongal - the south Indian harvest festival.....

12 comments:

Inty swetha said...

oh god!! its breath taking!!

Happy Pongal :)

muthu said...

@ Inty swetha-

Really... thanks a lot... I actually had another ending in mind...

But thought it was too negative...

wanna hear it-- Here goes...




Her voice was faint but stern. "Please can you kill me after you are done with me........."

A few silent seconds paused.

For once, he was lost for comments...


----- So what do you think..

Which ending suits better....

jingel bells said...

the end in the story appears better.
anyway good post.

muthu said...

@ jingle bells-

Thanks .....

& yeah, I too felt the same way....

:)

sm said...

interesting
story

muthu said...

@ sm --

Thanks.. :)

Apurva said...

First version is better....more powerful

muthu said...

@ Apurva--

hmhm.. yeah, it in a way gives out a positive ending...

I too liked it..

nut I thought that the second ending would have been heart wretchedly poignant..

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