The following contains material of mature discussion between my sister and myself and reader discretion is strongly advised. The author does not intend to hurt anyone’s ethics nor their cultural perceptions. The issues raised are but a fragment of quite a few pertinent questions that creep around the fringes of our mind, concealed, camouflaged and forgotten but still breathing, pulsing and very much alive.
The Snap-
Sis- “I wonder why it’s that hard for parents to teach
their own kids about Sex, their menstrual periods, related stuff. I think they
don’t really know the kind of misinformation that’s rampant among teens
especially girls.”
Myself- “Misinformation really. I honestly thought that with
internet, face book, chatting and stuff, kids today are more knowledgeable than
ever.”
Sis- “You THINK??”
Myself- “Wow, you sound pretty raw!! Why what happened?”
Sis- “hmhm… My friends and I were discussing about our first
periods, the way our parents handled us, the problems that we faced, our first
education on hygiene during periods and so on …………. and I heard some pretty
fucked up stories; Stories that I know to be true but just cannot digest the
reality of them.”
Myself- “Okay….”
Sis- “you do know my old roommate! Right? Did you know that
she actually believed that she had cancer when she had her first periods? She misinterpreted
her bleeding to be associated with cancer and assumed that she was going to
die. Imagine her terror as she struggled mentally for 2 months with that
misunderstood fact! Thankfully, her mother caught her bleeding during the third
month and that put an end to her misery.”
Myself-“Wow- that’s pretty hard to take in”
Sis- “Okay, then you are not going to believe a word of the
next one. Happened to one of my class mates. She had her first periods. Her
mother helped her clean up. They had the usual ceremony* marking her first menstrual
cycle. Then they went on with their lives. They never really talked about what
happened. And now again, imagine the state of the girl when her second period
starts. She was not just flabbergasted with the unexpected bleeding but ill
equipped to handle the situation when it occurred to her in school. Sordid chagrin
of a memory.”
Myself-“I…..... I don’t know what to say!!”
Sis-“Yeah, it does feels daunting! Right? To acknowledge
that matured adults are pretty much fumbling in the dark when it comes to dealing with
issues on teaching their own children stuff such as periods and sex in a sensible manner. It’s not like I want to
generalize but I think the majority of those who rant about the preservation of
culture fall under this same category.”
Myself- “hmhm… yeah, that argument can be made. And yes, honesty
with regard to such issues between kids and parents are pretty low. But still I
am at loss for words. How can such extremes of ignorance exist?”
Sis-“hmhm… It’s hard
to reason it out or explain. In a society such as ours where people want to preserve
the idea that they are culturally enigmatic, sometimes gives rise to some
pretty messed up scenarios. Some even hilarious!! You know, what happened to
me!! ”
Myself- “WHAT?? ”
Sis- “After my first
period mom was explaining to me about hygiene with regard to tampon usage and
its proper disposal. You know how she is – quite a stickler for keeping things
neat and compartmentalized. She was explaining to me that the best way to
manage the stuff to be used during periods was by keeping a separate bag for
all the pads and wipes being used. Then she gave bag for me and instructed me to
start using it. It was then that I saw a similar bag on the credenza and asked
her about it. She shrugged nonchalantly and told me, it was her own bag for her own periods. I
looked at her appalled and blurted out “You too have the same periods!!!” ”
Author’s note-
This is not an effort to impart any knowledge, nor any solutions
to bridge the gap that exists between the parents and their child when discussions pertaining to issues of sex, menstruation, hygiene and such are concerned.(I am hardly hardly an expert.) It is just a confirmation of the issues that are at hand and are eating away at the rims of our society. I just want people to take notice. Just want them to ponder for a few seconds. Just want them to be aware. Nothing more. Nothing less. Hence the succinct and sharp tone of the post.