The Quote -

"Nope, I don't really have anything new to say. but then, I always have something amazing to tell about things that you already know!!"

-Muthu

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Celebrating Diwali – A short Story

This post has been published by me as a part of the Blog-a-Ton 33; the thirty-third edition of the online marathon of Bloggers; where we decide and we write. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. The theme for the month is 'Celebrations'

This fiction won Silver in Blog-a-Ton 33. A warm thanks for all the readers who voted for this post.


The Tale-


“WOW”

The twelve year olds gasped as the bottle rocket leapt up into the sky, drawing an arc of glittering sprinkles and burst into a million lights. The inky night’s sky carried around the echoes of the bloom, still reverberating on the lucid eyes of the playful lot, as they stared up into the void waiting for the next dazzler. Anticipation welling in their chubby faces.

He looked at his street peers and sighed to himself as he walked to light the next cracker. He couldn't help his chest swelling a bit in pride, with each and every fancy cracker that he set ablaze, with the swirling showers that bound forward into the celestial heights, the litany of colors that shot out of his hand held sparklers, swirls, twirls and the light pearls, the middle of activity and celebrating frenzy. He let loose another bevy of fireworks and turned to look at the fascinated faces of the street kids. Pink, Violet, Amber and Magenta – a bunch of curious eyes followed the myriad lines cruising from the spilling sparks seething unbridled into the darkness of the night.

“Burst some more!! Burst some more” the street kids shouted. 

He sighed melodramatically pleased with himself, at the magnificence of the firecrackers that he was bursting and at the bevy of requests that piled up at him for his consideration. He smiled and responded. Once again, the street exploded into a plethora of colors brimming with incandescence and life. The poor kids jumped with their hands up, floating up along with them; their faded clothes raised and riveted, its torn rims scuffling in the passing wind, their dirty hair puzzled but still pandering to their delighted leaps, their lucid voices tethering in jubilation. Somewhere beneath their bare bucking legs laid forgotten the dirt sack- filled and tied tight with all the thrown away pieces of clothing and the bits of recyclable plastics, still rank with lurid fungus, an assemble of things that they thought was worth something from the streets and the occasional dustbin, their bag of scavenge, the bag that was to pay for their latter supper, if they were to get one.

But then, when in bliss now, why bother about later.

And just when the volley of crackers went down, he took out the real big ones, the 1000 walas* and held it out to them like a showman magician putting forth some object of great mystical value and a brief proud smile glinted down his lips just for a moment. And just as he sprang to the middle of the road to light the crackers, the kids scampered with frantic cries and hushes to a safe distance, just safe enough to be at the foot of the excitement. And the crackers did not disappoint. Even as he scuttled away with heroic sweeps of his legs after he lit the fuse, a jumble of drums rolled pitching and patting ripping out from a litany of lights skewing the borders of fun and festivities.


The Snap- 





And then finally, he brought forth his last show piece for the day; His most favorite of the lot; the last pack of bottle rockets; with special double shot; ones that exploded not once but twice in the sky sending out reels of lighted petals. And with each and every whoosh, boom and boom of every single rocket, he savored with vigor the fireworks, all the attention sweeping around him, the joy he threw open for everybody and most of all, just the bumbling binge of life that pumped around him.

After bursting all his crackers, he turned to his house with a dazzling smile and walked in, his strides smart and confident. His mother was in the kitchen cooking, his father as usual in front of the television with the news channel playing, its volume tuned up.


“Papa….” He whined “I want to see cartoon network…”

“Not now chotu*” his father retorted “Don’t disturb me. You can watch your cartoons later”

“P… L… E…. A….. S…. E….” He pitched up his voice dragging raw the bare legs of those syllables.

And just as his father turned at look at him, with irked lines crossing his face, their home went dark; A power failure. His father cursed to himself, got up and went out to look at the fuses. The house shone a melancholy amber, bathed in all the liquid light that the array of Diwali lamps put up; its hallowed luminescence drawing sweeping arcs of their shadows as he went along with his father to the front porch. And just then, he heard sharp jubilant laughs and yells coming from the street.

He went and peaked outside the courtyard gate.

Amid-st the dust being kicked up and the bunch of legs that warred with each other, a rough version of football was being played by the rag-picking kids. They pushed about each other trying to get their ball into some invisible goal, their ball that rolled around with gusto, their ball that clinked and rattled with each and every bounce, their ball; the bottle, his bottle, his own bottle, the one he used for lighting the fuses of those rockets, the one he got from his father after quite some tantrum, the bottle he simply forgot and left in the middle of nowhere, skittered across the street bumping from one tiny feet to another, chased and paused by the same bundle of feet.

And just then, the bottle rolled and landed right in front of him, kicked by one of those kids still soaked in the slime of their celebrations. They turned and looked at him, their brown limpid eyes expectant.

He looked at them and at the bottle and felt himself torn with indecision. Some part of him wanted to get his bottle, his bottle from these kids. Some part of him urged him to kick the bottle again and join in the game. But how can he?? It’s not like he hated them or don’t want to play with them. It’s just that, it felt somewhat awkward, him playing with them, the rag pickers. He stood there caught in a rut vacillating, his heart pounding in his ears, licks of sweat lining his underarms; his fingers pulling tight his shirt tails.

He looked down at his bottle once again, his bottle, his own bottle and then at the kids. It was not like he needed the bottle. But, why should he give it to them? He was not there playing. He was not there in the middle of things. He was not even involved. Of course, he was the one who forgot the bottle. But then it’s still his bottle. Right? And he doesn't really need any permission from anybody to take back the same bottle? Does he? Why shouldn't he? 

He started to edge towards the bottle; measured steps; One eye still on the bottle; one on the street kids. The bottle shimmered alone in the distant light of the diwali lamps. Its once smooth contours, now a parable of scars and lines, its fine features chipped and nipped in countless places, the bottle kept its silence for once, maybe it sensed the drama unfolding around. And just as he got near the bottle, he heard the clear voice of a girl from the bunch shouting.

“KICK”

He paused and looked blank at the bunch of kids staring at them; as blank as a deer caught in the severe lights of a racing truck. He just stared; lost for thoughts. The kids, like the kids they were jumped into the band wagon and chorused “KICK…… KICK…… KICK”. Their eyes alone shining in the darkness, along with those few diwali lamps still left with oil to continue burning.

Their throbbing voices flooded him in waves, their joy, their openness, their friendliness and the easy invitation to their game. He suddenly felt beaten, ashamed. He had wanted deprive them of their ball. He had wanted to stop all this fun, all this delight and rejoice, all this warmth and games; Just because he wanted back his broken bottle, his old wasted, broken bottle; His bottle that was going to end in the dustbin anyway; His bottle that was a another piece of litter for him; his bottle that he did not really have any lasting interest in, His bottle, his own junk bottle but their coveted ball.

His throat clenched with emotion and his young eyes welled up. He looked at their them warmly. Their eyes alone shone in the darkness, sparkling with rapture and exalted delectation. A fete embellished and garnished with innocence and life. The kids were wanted their balls. It was their ball. He took a deep breath and moved forward to kick the bottle to them and to join them in the game.

And just then, the power came back on. The front porch lights blinked suddenly illuminating the expanse of the street, replacing the kind and warm lights of diwali lamps with the harsh and static shine of electricity. The new brilliance spilled the realities that the diwali lamps had kissed and missed; The torn dirty ragging clothes flapping free in the wind, their dry dejected hair, their dingy bare feet with nails rimmed with grime, their noses dripping with phlegm and their bundle of dirty rags left to stink in the corner of the street. And as he hesitated, in that split second, he heard the sharp voice of his father calling for him.

“Chotu*, where are you?”

He turned and walked slowly to his father, leaving the bottle right where it stopped in the first place. His strides thoughtfully slow.

“Hey… Why the long face? What happened?” his father quizzed.

“Nothing” he said.

“hmhm .... Really!!”

“hmhm hmhm” he nodded.

“Okay, come on” said his father as he led him by hand into the house. “I am hungry. Let’s see what your mother has made for dinner.”

And as they went inside hand in hand, he could help but hear the rampant jubilation of the street kids and their game of football, still celebrating Diwali.

Fin


*1000 walas - a firecracker that is made from 1000 smaller pieces and it very famous in India during the celebrations of Diwali

*Chotu - Colloquial call name for kids. (translates as small one in Hindi - an Indian Language)



Author’s note-

When I first contemplated this tale, I was thinking of giving it a happy ending with the kid joining in for the football game. With Diwali celebrations ahead, I wanted to write something that will uplift the moods of everyone reading this post. My sister, my first critic – did not like that ending. She simply told me that you cannot sacrifice a good story, in order to provide a happy ending and a cliched one at that. So, I revised the story – to work in a more practical manner and that gave me this bitter sweet ending. Hence, I share creative credits of this story with my sister.

Also, I take immense joy in wishing a very happy and a memorable Diwali to each and every one of my friends, reading this post and their families. I bid you guys’ good health and great spirits in this festive season. And ample luck to all my buddy - blog-a-ton participants. Hope you guys have a great time blogging this holiday season.



PS-

Diwali is an important festival of India that usually comes around in November.  It is celebrated with bursting crackers, exchanging sweets and savories that are home made and decorating nights with rows and rows of Diwali lights (trust me, you should see the resplendence of the them. Its from these lamps that Diwali also gets the name as Festival of lights ).

In my native, Tamil Nadu- the festival marks the victory of Lord Krishna over the Demon Narakasura. It is said that the demon himself when dying at the hands of the Krishna, requested to him, that he did not want to be forgotten and would like for his death to be celebrated with the bursting of  noisy crackers(the tale as told by my grandmother). There are several other origin stories for Diwali and to know more about them and to know more about the festival itself- Kindly visit the given link.



The fellow Blog-a-Tonics who took part in this Blog-a-Ton and links to their respective posts can be checked here. To be part of the next edition, visit and start following Blog-a-Ton. Introduced By: BLOGGER NAME, Participation Count: 05

167 comments:

Harikrishna said...

I am the first one to comment here? Its once again an excellent narration... Need not to say, you made the story beautiful by its narration.. You have made your readers imagine the scenes as the story evolves.. The emotions and the state of the boy's mind are well expressed! Superb!!!

dreamer said...

hail to you and your critic sister :)

Someone is Special said...

yet another great tale from you. I liked this ending - a bitter sweet one.. and I shall congrats you and your sister for this beautiful tale :)

Someone is Special

Harshal Gupta said...

The description of the feelings of Chotu was really brilliant. It kept my eyes hooked till the very last end. Indeed Diwali is a festival where all join for one big celebration. :) May yours also be full of lights. :) ATB FOR BAT

nan said...

He pitched up his voice dragging raw the bare legs of those syllables.... Loved the description :)


You are a master narrator Muthu. I can go on and on reading your stories. The simplest of things are described so vividly and in a manner not even remotely imagined ever before. Kudos !

And of of course I second you sister. :)

muthu said...

@ Harikrishna ---

Thanks a lot for your comments. I loved narrating the kid's dilemma myself. hmhm.. I did think that, I was getting into a bit too much of detail when he was bursting crackers but then decided that was needed to show the mentality of the kid and the scenario that the story was being played in.

muthu said...

@ dreamer ---

Thanks a lot- will sure convey the regards to my sister. :D I am glad that the tale resonated with you. :)

muthu said...

@ Someone is Special --

Yes, I have to concur with you. The bitter sweet ending is much better. Thank you for your comments.

muthu said...

@ Harshal Gupta ---

I am glad that chotu's dilemma had you following to the end. :) And warm wishes to you to. Have a great Diwali. :)

muthu said...

@ nan ---

Thank you. I loved writing the same tale. And yes, my sister is always right- :D (haha... don't tell her, I said that :P)

And hey, you are a great reader. :D

Panchali said...

Muthu...

I loved this. Marvelous writing. The whole ambiance right from the beginning is overpowering, thrilling...exciting!! The scenes of bursting crackers sync with emotions, attitudes, conflicts been so beautifully rendered....

And I agree with your sister about the 'bitter sweet ending' :)))
All the best for BAT!

Meoww said...

Lovely words spun together with wonderful results. Wow Story!

magiceye said...

Beautifully woven poignant tale.

magiceye said...

Beautifully woven poignant tale.

untony said...

Beautiful story!

You have written a double tale, sharing the human side which is one around the world and the cultural side unknown for most of us!

You are very good writer

Thank you!

Indrani Ghose said...

Very well narrated story.

the little princess said...

one word..brilliant!!!

Sayantini Bhattacharya said...

Oh! I loved that story. It, in some points, reminded me of my childhood. All the best :)

Visit my blog @ another part of me

chips from a life said...

simple detailing made the story vivid. great work.

aativas said...

The dilemma and the natural response to such situation is expressed very beautifully. The story sounds so real ...

jai shruti said...

that was very beautifully narrated :)and yes this ending is perfect.

muthu said...

@ Panchali ---

Thanks a lot for your warm words... In a way, I could relate to the dilemma of the kid and hence I think, I was able to capture the essence of it in a credible manner.

And yes, my sister is right about the ending. :)

muthu said...

@ Meoww ---

And I am so glad I made you go wow. :D

muthu said...

@ magiceye --

I am happy that you think so!! :)

muthu said...

@ untony ---

Honestly, Thank you for those warm comments..

All would like to do- is create something memorable. That's it. :)

muthu said...

@ Indrani Ghose ---

Thank-you for those warm compliments.. :)

muthu said...

@ the little princess ---

And with one heart- Thank you. :)

muthu said...

@ Sayantini Bhattacharya --

I am glad that the tale resonated with you. I drew inspiration from my own perspectives as a kid. :)

muthu said...

@ chips from a life ---

hmhm... yeah, I want to make every single one of my lines vivid. And I am happy to have achieved it. :)

muthu said...

@ aativas ---

Yes, I wanted it to be so. As real as it gets. I mean reality is almost always stranger than fiction. Right??

Thanks a lot for your comments.

muthu said...

@ jai shruti ---

Thank-you for your compliments. I enjoyed writing the narration myself. It was an indulging experience. :)

Yatin Khurana said...

well i like such stories, incidents rather where someone just pauses and leave that situation without doing much of it !

i don't know if that was what conveyed,anyhow i like your story !

Reshma said...

You have described the usually untold emotions in a wonderful way...I felt I saw the whole story unfold in front of my eyes...
A round of applause for your critic as well:) All the Best:)

Roshni AaMom said...

A wonderful story!! I enjoyed it and you gave it an apt ending!!

Devilish Angel said...

Well written...

Megha said...

This was so close to reality! :)
I liked it, and I liked it even more because of the way you wrote it.. No doubt, your sister guided you with the ending but I would still congratulate you for narrating the "bursting crackers" paragraphs magnificently! :)
A very different and modest tale on the theme.. wishing you a very Happy festive season too :)
ATB for BAT :)

Bikramjit said...

well I beleive in true stories not the cliche ones.. thats the reason why we are in a mess already because we think all will be happy ending, while life teaches us otherwise :)

I loved the story and the way it ended .. that is what the truth is .. How many times I have been asked by my father to get back into the house and not play with them ..

I am sure many households have the same

Bikram's

jaish_vats said...

Such a simple story told so beautifully muthu! At first I picturized a grown up man doing some social service...Only later did i realize that the protagonist is a little fellow! Awesome!

muthu said...

@ Yatin Khurana --

Thanks a lot for your comments and I am glad that you liked it.

hmhm... The idea of the story centers around the moral dilemma that the kid has -- between his ego centered self (his cracker bursting bit and his pride about how he is able to provide joy to people around him) versus his innocence and his inert nature to join the kids for a game.

And hence what he decides to do with the bottle becomes an issue of social observation. Well, at-least that's how I meant to mean it. :)

He finally leaves the bottle but does not join with them to play. The battle was won but the war was lost. And hence a bitter sweet ending.

muthu said...

@ Reshma --

And I am glad that my story visually engaged you. Well, that's what I love to write- something that people can relate to- average-everyday stuff- normal stuff like what happens to you and me and how that makes up the society.

Thanks a lot for your comments.

muthu said...

@ Roshni AaMom --

And I am glad that you enjoyed it. :D

muthu said...

@ Devilish Angel --

Welcome to my blog and thanks a lot for your comment!!

Would love to see more of you here. :)

muthu said...

@ Megha ---

Thank you for your warm comments. I want to portray reality- If people cannot relate to what I am writing, I don't really think that- I am doing justice to them spending time with my words.

And I loved writing those bursting crackers paras myself. :)

muthu said...

@ Bikramjit ---

hmhm... Honestly, reality is much stranger than cliches and fiction. And I believe that its not about happy ending but about a happy journey.

As long as you are having the time of your life, I believe that the destination will always be enjoyable.

muthu said...

@ jaish_vats ---

hmhm... I must have added something to give his age at the starting. It would have been more concrete. Thank you for pointing that out to me. Will sure look into it.

Thank you for your comments...

Ankita Sharma said...

bitter-sweet but really well written!

muthu said...

@ Ankita Sharma ---

And I am glad that you think so.. Welcome to my blog. Hope to see you more of you here. :)

Happy reading.

Ankita Sharma said...

sure! in the meantime, check out the posts here : http://ani-eos.posterous.com/a-solitary-diwalito-all-those-away-from-home

Pavil said...

"He pitched up his voice dragging raw the bare legs of those syllables"....quite interesting....An amazing story.
A minor point...I remember with Rockets,the bottle to hold it is always a tough choice. But if its a glass bottle one cant play football with it & a plastic bottle is never strong enough to stand still unless one puts some sand or stones inside.
ATB for BAT.

muthu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
muthu said...

@ Pavil ---

Thank you for your comments and Welcome to my blog..

hmhm.. Yeah, you are have indeed a valid point. Playing foot ball with a glass bottle is pretty hard and it will not be easy on the feet of the kids.

hmhm.. The thing is -- They were street kids and I wanted them to just have fun kicking around the bottle. And as being from the streets, they aren't really concerned with playing football with regard to the rules.

And, Like I have put, It was a rough version of football- that was concerned with more of their pushing and pulling, trying to have the bottle at their feet rather than any actual foot ball.

hmhm... Thank you once again for that -- sharp critique. It gave me something to think about. Also, I tried describing the damage to the bottle at the end in order to convey that -- it was a glass bottle that is being talked about here.

hmhm.. I could have made a more solid statement about the bottle- I imagined a bottle of mini coke or Pepsi. those things are pretty hard to break. I should have indicated the same in the story.

Will be more thoughtful in forthcoming stories. :)

Karan Shah said...

bitter..but beautiful presented...thoroughly enjoyed it :)
ATB for BAT :)

Ritvik Gautam said...

An awesome tale, with a sad but practical end. I was gripped to the story till the end, wanting to know what happens next.
Wishing you a very Happy Diwali!
ATB for BAT! :)

muthu said...

@ Karan Shah ---

Thank-you for your comments. :)

muthu said...

@ Ritvik Gautam ---

am glad the fiction got to you. Cheers and happy reading.

Welcome to my blog and Hope to see more of you here.

Amit - The Frivolous Analyser said...

Nice story and great narration ...

Team Kailash Online said...

Wish all of you a happy and prosperous Diwali.May this Diwali bring lots of happiness to your life

Roshni AaMom said...

I liked your story so much, I featured it. check it out here: http://momofbigalittlea.blogspot.com/2012/11/what-ive-been-reading-this-week-16.html
Feel free to share!

unknownshri said...

The description of the crackers burning, the dilemma the kid faces - just awesome.

Just as one writer to another - do you think this would have made a more powerful tale if narrated from the viewpoint of one of the rag pickers?

Ashwini C N said...

Wonderfully narrated. True, it is always the small things like these that gives us joys. Happy Diwali :-)

muthu said...

@ Amit - The Frivolous Analyser --

Thanks a lot for your comments.. :)

muthu said...

@ Team Kailash Online --

Thank you and wish you too a great and awesome Diwali. :)

muthu said...

@ Roshni AaMom --

Thanks a million for that feature.. :)

muthu said...

@ unknownshri --

I think it would have been a altogether different tale. It would have been about how the rag picker kids find happiness in simple things rather than the dilemma of a well to do kid.

I think that both stories have their merits but-- I have read so many stories about being poor and how even poor people see the silver lining of the dark cloud and celebrate.

I wanted to write something that would give the opposite end of the fiction.

Thank you for your comments. Loved answering you.

muthu said...

@ Ashwini C N --

Happy Diwali to you too. :D

Aarthy said...

Wonderfully written .. I did not lose interest even for a second in spite of the story being quite long .. The way you built up the scenes completely held my attention .. The well woven words were a pleasure to read .. Keep Writing! And congratulations on winning the contest!

muthu said...

@ Aarthy ---

Thanks a lot for your warm comments. Welcome to my blog and I hope to see more of you here..

Cheers and happy reading.. :)

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