The Puberty Talk-

The following contains material of mature discussion between my sister and myself and reader discretion is strongly advised. The author does not intend to hurt anyone’s ethics nor their cultural perceptions. The issues raised are but a fragment of quite a few pertinent questions that creep around the fringes of our mind, concealed, camouflaged and forgotten but still breathing, pulsing and very much alive.

The Snap-

Sis- “I wonder why it’s that hard for parents to teach their own kids about Sex, their menstrual periods, related stuff. I think they don’t really know the kind of misinformation that’s rampant among teens especially girls.”

Myself- “Misinformation really. I honestly thought that with internet, face book, chatting and stuff, kids today are more knowledgeable than ever.”

Sis- “You THINK??”

Myself- “Wow, you sound pretty raw!! Why what happened?”

Sis- “hmhm… My friends and I were discussing about our first periods, the way our parents handled us, the problems that we faced, our first education on hygiene during periods and so on …………. and I heard some pretty fucked up stories; Stories that I know to be true but just cannot digest the reality of them.”

Myself- “Okay….”

Sis- “you do know my old roommate! Right? Did you know that she actually believed that she had cancer when she had her first periods? She misinterpreted her bleeding to be associated with cancer and assumed that she was going to die. Imagine her terror as she struggled mentally for 2 months with that misunderstood fact! Thankfully, her mother caught her bleeding during the third month and that put an end to her misery.”

Myself-“Wow- that’s pretty hard to take in”

Sis- “Okay, then you are not going to believe a word of the next one. Happened to one of my class mates. She had her first periods. Her mother helped her clean up. They had the usual ceremony* marking her first menstrual cycle. Then they went on with their lives. They never really talked about what happened. And now again, imagine the state of the girl when her second period starts. She was not just flabbergasted with the unexpected bleeding but ill equipped to handle the situation when it occurred to her in school. Sordid chagrin of a memory.”

Myself-“I…..... I don’t know what to say!!”  

Sis-“Yeah, it does feels daunting! Right? To acknowledge that matured adults are pretty much fumbling in the dark when it comes to dealing with issues on teaching their own children stuff such as periods and sex in a sensible manner. It’s not like I want to generalize but I think the majority of those who rant about the preservation of culture fall under this same category.”

Myself- “hmhm… yeah, that argument can be made. And yes, honesty with regard to such issues between kids and parents are pretty low. But still I am at loss for words. How can such extremes of ignorance exist?”

Sis-“hmhm…  It’s hard to reason it out or explain. In a society such as ours where people want to preserve the idea that they are culturally enigmatic, sometimes gives rise to some pretty messed up scenarios. Some even hilarious!! You know, what happened to me!! ”

Myself- “WHAT?? ”

Sis-  “After my first period mom was explaining to me about hygiene with regard to tampon usage and its proper disposal. You know how she is – quite a stickler for keeping things neat and compartmentalized. She was explaining to me that the best way to manage the stuff to be used during periods was by keeping a separate bag for all the pads and wipes being used. Then she gave bag for me and instructed me to start using it. It was then that I saw a similar bag on the credenza and asked her about it. She shrugged nonchalantly and told me, it was her own bag for her own periods. I looked at her appalled and blurted out “You too have the same periods!!!” ”

* In Tamil Culture, the first Menstrual cycle of the girl is celebrated as a customary ceremony of welcoming her into adulthood. 

Author’s note-

This is not an effort to impart any knowledge, nor any solutions to  bridge the gap that exists between the parents and their child when discussions pertaining to issues of sex, menstruation, hygiene and such are concerned.(I am hardly hardly an expert.) It is just a confirmation of the issues that are at hand and are eating away at the rims of our society. I just want people to take notice. Just want them to ponder for a few seconds. Just want them to be aware. Nothing more. Nothing less. Hence the succinct and sharp tone of the post. 

Of fair women & fairer men

Disclaimer –
The following is just the author and his friend shooting the shit together and is not intended to establish any credible facts with regard to anything. It’s just another day with two argumentative Indians talking about some crap but then who says shit ain’t interesting. : P



The Snap -

Myself- Do men actually fall for that bull shit. John Abraham all smiles and muscles, asking people to care for your skin. Pathetic.

Kishore- hmhm….. It always cracks me up, the way they usually show your skin color getting fairer in a very short period in such ads. Imagine the world if that one was really possible, there would not be a single fellow with dark skin.

Myself- Oi…. Don’t say that. Our skin is our identity. I like its brown color. I just can’t understand the idea of men trying to get fair.

Kishore- Yeah, but then you speak for yourself. I know people working with me who use that men’s fairness cream.

Myself- Dude- Seriously! Oh god. I think that men are losing the idea of what it’s like to be men actually. Men are supposed to be worldly, funny, burnt from all the roaming in the sun. I mean, not all of us market our asses to wine and dine, only a few like Abraham-ji get to do that.

Kishore- I think, that all this has to do with- love for white skin. I think it’s rampant even more so, than when we got our independence. May be some mind set that’s left over from our colonial era.

Myself- No, that really isn’t it. I think that corporate work is making pussies out of men. What kind of men wants to be groomed and fair for his girl? You want to be strong for her. You want to be funny, yeah intelligent but fair. I can understand that it’s in the nature of women to be concerned with their looks. But men! I find that hard to digest.

Kishore- Now, you just being a sexist asshole.

Myself- yeah, I am if it means to save the last piece of honor left for men. Hey, did you know that Miss.World this year is a Chinese girl.

Kishore- hmhm…. I remember this mock group discussion we had in our UG days. The topic given was whether all these beauty pageants were doing any credible good or just a waste of time and resource. I remember this guy’s argument. He was quite convincing actually. His assertion was that all these beauty pageants are but vehicles for all these skin care and cosmetic items to enter in to the country. He did have a few valid points. Like how, after Aishwarya Rai was crowned Miss.World, the influx of all foreign cosmetic brands in India increased exponentially. It was like, she gave credibility to them. And I think that, it’s pretty much the same with all the countries.

Myself- Damn…. That’s one heavy argument to make. Yeah, it’s pretty hard to defeat that argument. Even if you say that, the selection process is democratic and everything is done for world peace, you just cannot avoid the fact that it’s just a great publicity vehicle not just for the girl but anything brand, industry or life style associated with the girl.

Kishore- If you ask me, all their concerns about the world, the way those girls talk about poverty, and peace and any other issue dressed up in their cleavage arresting designer clothes is pretty much a satire in itself.

Myself- hmhm…. You got that one right. It’s like KarunaNidhi suddenly caring for the Lankan Tamils now. Pretty much BS. And hey, did you know that he has started an official twitter account.

Kishore- who? KarunaNidhi. No kidding. Hey, I think I am going to open a twitter account just to follow his tweets.

Myself- hahaha…. Do that. You don’t want to miss the BS of the master of BS.




Author’s note – 
We had this conversation this week end. Though, we talked about a lot of things, Like P. Sainath’s lecture at a Kollam university (which we buffered it on YouTube), the immense stupidity of the movie my friend saw (battleship), the prospective market and the features for the new counter strike global offensive, about some music and some politics. I limited the exchange to general issues so as not to bore you guys. Hope, the shit was worth shooting.


PS-
And yes, Mr.KarunaNidhi has started a new twitter account @Kalaignar89. You can get your daily dose of BS in just 140 characters.

The wounds will heal- A 55 fiction.

The Snap-

The fiction- 

“Hold still.”

“Hmhm.”

“I will be done in a minute.”

“Hmhm.”

“It will take a couple of days. But it will heal.”

“Hmhm.”

“Try not to strain yourself until the wounds heal.”

“Hmhm”

And just after he bandaged her, he stammered “I….. am sorry”

Silence fell hard, for once harder than his thrashes.

Author's Note-

When people read my post - Two minutes- A short story, I was asked whether the fiction was about domestic violence. While answering back to those comments, I was inspired to write a shot fiction about the same topic. I wanted the story to be brutal, realistic and hard hitting. Hope you guys like it.

ps-

I am experimenting with my blog's appearance, so guys I would like to have your comments on the topic. Thank you.

A perspective war-

Author's note-


A few sketches of random Dialogs often hit us in the face with some fresh perspectives. Sometimes silly, sometimes outrageous, sometimes even unacceptabe but then, don't perspectives make the world what it is?? :)

This post, guys is a conversation I had with my friend a couple of days ago.



The snap--






The dialog-



Pari- "How about you muthu. Will you take any dowry."

Myself- "Nope. I think that dowry in a way degrades the man more than the women. What kind of a man will take money from the women he promises to love and care for."

Pari- "hmhm.... but didn't you say that you want a working girl."

Myself- "Of course, yeah.... I paused for a second.....Why??? Whats wrong with that.. "

Pari- "Well... she going to bring her earnings along with her for life. Isn't that dowry enough."

Myself- "But...... " I paused, my mind scampering for a proper reply and returned back empty handed. I thought aloud. "I have never thought of it that way"

"But then..... " I retaliated. "A marriage is not a buying and a selling issue. You are going to share your life and I wanted a married girl coz I want the girl to be somebody on her own, have a passion of her own, a story of her own."

Pari sighed. "Yeah... yeah... yeah... but then you could not really refuse my argument head on. Could you...."

I replied back. "It's just perspectives my friend. Just perspectives.... "


I had no other reply.





PS-


A happy new year guys. I hope that every single one of you have a great year ahead, do what you guys always wanted to do, get everything that you guys always wished for.


& I wanted to see where the Telangana issue is heading before I write about it as a post. Since this issue rises a lot of questions of rather uncomfortable in nature- I felt it would not do justice unless I write a complete trilogy on the subject. My last trilogy which indeed was my first was a self satisfying, in a way self questioning experience. So, I look forward to write this. Do give me some time.


(If you do wanna try out my Trilogy on sex and society :- Do chk out- the links are- part1 , part2 , part 3 )



See you in my next post guys....

Randomness - a few selected dialogues-

Of a random lot of people we get to talk to and of the chaos of conversations in our daily lives, a few do stay with us. Having it's own sense of sense of humor and satire, even a mild bit of romanticism included, this is a summation of a few interesting conversations that I had with the guys I met over here in Hyderabad.



Of girls and future partners-


Deepak - "I want a nice cultured gal. A girl who hasn't been introduced yet to the fast life style of the modern society, preferably a village girl. Perhaps a bit cute and bubbly. Imagine all the fun, I will have taking her to all new places, looking into her eyes when they go wide with awe as she looks at all the new things to which she hasn't been introduced to in life."

"Ahh... It will be a total blast. I want my marriage life to be an exploration for her. May be, I will convert her into a village girl into a modern girl."

He paused. Took a deep breath taking in the bliss of his dream. After a second or two of silent reminiscence, he turned & looked at me.

"What about you? What kind of girl, you want?"

"hmhm, I want a modern girl. Someone who knows about everything. Someone knowledgeable and yeah, She should have a great smile"

"A modern girl" Deepak retorted.

"Yeah, Perhaps someone who has already been in a relationship..."

"What" His voice punched me back.

"Yeah, someone who has already been in a relationship. Someone who knows the value of what it is to be in a relationship. Someone who knows that relationships are more than sharing SMSes and flirting. Someone who can be mature when I get silly, Someone who can see me beyond all the facade of hormones. Someone who knows, what it is to be heartbroken. Someone to share life with."

"But, in that case, you won't be the first love for that girl, Muthu. They wont be fresh for you." Deepak looked at me questioningly.

I calmly answered back - "That's OK. I never said that I am fresh either."



The snap-





Of Morality as a life issue-


Harish- So you drink?

"Yeah, Occasionally & when I do so, I prefer vodka."

Harish did not reply anything back. He just sat there looking at me with a mild smile.

"What da?? Do you think that drinking is that bad?" I asked him.

He shrugged. "Of course, It's bad. Right?"

After a second of silent thought I replied- "Depends on how you look at it..."

"Really, & what do you mean by that?"

"Well, lets say, you are a guy who always has stood for what you think is good. Righteous. Always living your life by the norms of the society. So you get a good job, get married to a good girl, create a good family, leave a good legacy behind. In the end, what do you think you have achieved. You have achieved nothing. You have just followed the road that was taken & still being taken by countless Indians, who live their lives not for what they desire but for what the society desires out of them."

"People will say - Accept today's pain for tomorrow's happiness. That's the most silly piece of advice anybody can give you. You can never enjoy anything that you did not love doing. It's no different from school education, we study because we are told that's what everybody does. A bunch of sheep following another bunch of sheep. So, you work hard to get accepted by the society, what next. After you have achieved, the so called public acceptance, what are you going to do? Is your life that all... Trying to gain the approval of someone doesn't even have a face to be identified with."

"I live life the way I love it. Maybe, it's not in accordance with the morality that's usually defined. But I do not disturb anybody. I just want to live life for me, do things that I rejoice, Be happy for what I am. I wont be appreciated for that after my death. But then by my death, I would have millions of cherished memories. So what people are going to say about me, now or ever- doesn't really matter, Does it??"

"& anyways only when you love what you are doing, the spectacular best in you comes out... Right??" I challenged him with a questioning smile.


"You are dangerous guy da. I should try stay away from you" He replied back.

"Really!!" I laughed. "Why??"

"You almost had me convinced there.."




Of Love & Marriage --


Mukesh- "What about you da... love marriage or arranged marriage."

"Hopefully, Love marriage da." I replied.

"Really, do you have a girl friend now"

"Nope"

"Then...."

"Well, I think, I will fall in love in the near future."

"What if, you never fall in love da"

"That probably wont happen...."

"I only asked, what if??"

"Then probably, I wont marry...."

"What?? Really" He asked me incredulously.

"yeah, a marriage for the sake of marriage is a waste of everything da.."

After a second of thought, he asked me back-

"Then what about your sex life da??"

And for once I did not have a wise retort to answer him back. I looked at him blankly for a moment before changing the topic with a mild joke. But then, It did make me wonder- Do people really get married so that they can have legalised sex.



Author's note-


This post is not an attempt to criticize anyone's point of view but I wrote it, so as to bring the variety of opinions that people can have with regard to everything and anything in life.